What Is Love?
by January83
Summary: They were childhood friends, he protected her from all harm, and made her smile when she forgot to. Ally was hit and Brocken down by her very own father, and when she needed Austin the most he left her promising to come back for her, but he never did until 5 years later when they meet up again by fate. Austin is now a different person with a cold heart, can he find out what love is
1. Chapter 1

**What Is Love?**

**Ally's P.O.V**

It's days like this when I think of him, on cold, cloudy, dark days when you know the sky is about to cry along with you. I spent 4,382 days with that blonde headed, brown eyed boy that's exactly 12 years. I've known him since we were in diapers barely learning to walk and talk, we've done everything together like learning to sing, and learn to play every musical instrument known to man.

He always took me away from reality, he protected me when the person I'm forced to call 'Dad' beats my mother and I, like animals we're nothing but punching bags to him, he'll beat me till I'm black and blue and can barely stand, usually my mother takes the hits for me, and sends me to play with my lifelong friend. Who would always wipe my tears, and tell me everything will be alright.

He would put bandages over my scrapes, and bruises, and make me smile when I thought I couldn't anymore. He always tried his best to protect me from anyone who would try and harm me. We were inseparable, well at least that's what I thought on my 12th birthday he told me he was moving away from here, but promised to come back for me, and that he would send me a postcard from where he was.

1,825 is the number of days I haven't seen his face, 1,825 days waiting for him to come back for me, 1,825 days of still waiting for a postcard from him. Exactly 5 years, now 17 years old I got tired of waiting, and staring out my window too see only strangers pass by. All I have are memories now of him, that I wish I would forget already! All I ever known was Brocken promises.

And now the tears won't stop, his thick scent was here but not anymore. I cant smile, because he's not here anymore.

Yet I'm not sorry I met him...Austin Moon.

"Ally come down stairs please, Trish is on the phone." yelled my mom from down stairs, I sighed and got up from my bed near the window where all you can really see is fog, and dark clouds. I climbed down the stairs to the living room where my mom was holding the phone for me, " Thanks." I told my mother as I took the phone from her, and talked on the other line.

"Hello?" I said to Trish on of my great friends who also knew Austin for a while, and saw the special connection we had with each other, she would even tease us when we were kids how we would one day get married. Yeah Right. "Hey Ally, are up to hanging out today like about...right now?" Trish said to me happily and giddy, I furrowed my eyebrows and said, "Sure" Confusedly.

"Great I'll pick you up soon!" She finished and hung up, I rolled my eyes and laughed a little before going up to my room, and changing into a white flowy floral top, denim jeans, and black flats. I loosed my hair letting all my ombre curls fall over my shoulders beautifully, I then put light makeup on, and covered my bruises with some cover up makeup.

I took one last look at myself in the mirror, and went back downstairs where my mom had just hung up the phone, and was smiling graciously, close to tears. "Uh mom are you okay?" I asked her as I walked over to her, she nodded and told me, "Better than ever, now don't take long okay, when you get back your in for a surprise." I gave her a half smile, and nodded even though I was confused.

I then heard Trish honk her car signaling me to come outside and meet her I quickly grabbed some cash, and left out the door after saying goodbye to my mom. When I left outside I saw Trish waiting in her car, and I smiled and entered, while buckling my seatbelt I asked, "Where are we going?" with curiosity. "Oh, to the small Plaza here nearby with Dez you know him right?" She replayed.

"You mean the one you always yell at over the phone with the things you say to him, I don't think you can technically call him your 'friend'." I said to her "Yeah well he finally told me something very interesting, and now we're gonna go down to meet him." She said I giggled a bit and shook my head before looking out the car window sensing today's gonna be different.

It wasn't that long of a car ride only about 10 minutes, when we got there she hurriedly came out, and walked ahead to where a tall, red head, colorful guy was waiting. I then walked to them and said, "Hi nice to meet you I'm Ally." to him. "Oh hi My names Dez!" He said cheerfully to me with a wide smile. Trish then pulled Dez forcefully to the side where I heard her half yell/whisper.

As the two were arguing my eyes wandered over at all the buildings, then up to the grey, sad sky, and back down where I saw a all figure come out of one of the buildings. He had his hood up, and his head down looking at the floor, he was wearing dark clothing and you could see some of his messy blond hair coming down from his face. He was walking near us, and I don't know why.

Somehow with every step he took closer to us my breathing began getting heavier, and my heart began beating faster, I counted every step he walked, like how I counted every step Austin took when he walked away from me before, and he is now six steps away from me, and I'm holding in my breath and biting down on my lip nervously.

1..2,..3,..4..,5...and 6.

My heart froze, and my breathing seemed to has stopped when he took of his hood, and lifted his head up to look at me with a pair of bright brown eyes curiously, like he was trying to figure me out. It only took me one look, only one to know who he was, I knew who those eyes belonged to no other then Austin Moon. He continued to look at me deeply, with his eyebrows furrowed.

He began walking a little closer to me, but I slowly backed away and turned my head to the side, yet he didn't move away from me, Dez and Trish decided to break the silence by saying, "Have you two by any chance met before?" and he used his right hand to hold my chin up to look at him and we stared at each other deeply immediately feeling connected .

He then tilted his head a bit to the side before saying, "Yes I think we've met before." In that instant it started to pour heavily down on us, and every second it seemed to become heavier, hurting us with every drop that landed on us. He pulled away from me, and looked up to the sky before back to me, who's still feeling numb after seeing him.

" Great, it's raining now!" Trish said angrily, "Ugh I don't have a ride Trish can you give me one." Dez said suspiciously, "Oh, but my car is only for two passengers, what about our friends?" She said ominously, "Guess they'll have to figure out something." He replayed and Trish nodded and they both began running to her car, while he yelled at them.

"Great." I mumbled under my breath, the rain began getting harder, and we were starting to get soaked like never before. Austin started to wave his hand out, obviously calling for a taxi to come took less than a minute for one to notice him, and stop for us. He opened the door for me, but I went around the car, and opened the door on the side for myself.

I was incredibly angry to see he's been doing good, and forgot all about me, I can't I just can't...

**Austin's P.O.V**

God that was strange to see her again, met by a friend of a friend all I could do was smile and say, 'Yes I think we've met before.' I remember those hypnotic and mysterious brown eyes of hers. She was genuinely beautiful like no other girl, she had red plump lips, beautiful curly ombre hair, clear flawless skin, and a nice petite frame. She, she was really beautiful not like those girls who plaster tons of makeup on their faces.

She melt my heart and now I want to catch her. She has forever fascinated me, and I won't be denied by her.

She was natural, and gorgeous normally I would say a girl like her is hot, or sexy, but to call this baby-faced beauty that seemed wrong, when I locked eyes with her I felt like I've known her forever, I felt a connection she brought sparks into my eyes which is rare. Somehow when looked at her I felt my stone heart actually beat, like it was still alive, but how?

We drove in silence across Pont Champlain, and all of that time she must have thought I was sad I was trying to remember her name. The whole ride she stared out the window looking at the rain as it fell to the ground, hearing it, the rain. She had told the cab driver where to stop at, which was the same stop I was getting off, I found that strange, but thought nothing of it.

As we approached our stop, she opened and slammed the door, and began walking away fast, I quickly paid the taxi driver and went after her sensing something was wrong. "Hey, where you going'?" I asked her, and she kept on walking in the pouring, freezing rain before replaying, "None of your business." I was thrown back a little no girl has ever acted like that with me, usually they were all up on me, but she was different, it was really refreshing.

We were walking in the same direction, down the same block, near the same house which is starting to get weird, I'm in town to visit my mom's friend and her daughter she has known for a long time, I didn't want to come I was more like dragged here. I just wanted to stay home, and party, with all my friends and girls mainly girls, I guess you can say I'm a player.

They say I need a reality check, I'm popular at school, but hardly show up, and have a bad reputation, I'm dangerous and never have had a real relationship with anyone, sure I would go out with girls for the night dump them when the night was over, you know, you see...

I'd love, but don't know how to

I find love brutal, and have an ice cold stone heart waiting for that person to turn that all around, I use to be different I use play music all the time, and sing I haven't touched an instrument for 5 years I wonder why. I just stopped being happy. The people around me don't seem to notice how dark, and secretive I now am, their just with me to be popular, except Dez.

He's a really great friend, my only _real_ friend I'm always alone trying to sort things out I guess its funny how you can give a fake smile, and have nobody notice I'm a pro when it comes to fake smiling, and getting girls my two best qualities I guess you can say. Well that's just me...

I even smoke and drink now, often no one really knowsI don't even know myself anymore or who I am, but I know if your warm then you can't relate to me...

Me, and this girl are still walking in the same direction I think she noticed too, "Are you stalking me or something cause if you are, your doing a terrible job." She told me and I looked up to see her, "I'm a busy person I don't have time to stock you, even if you very pretty." I said while raising a brow, and she rolled her eyes and looked down. Her hair was dripping wet with this freaking rain.

"That's all you have to say to me?" She said coming closer to me I gave her a confused look and said, "What do you mean?" she then shook her head and told me, "Wow, really Austin it's been 5 years and all you say to me is I'm pretty I bet you don't even remember my name. Do me a favor and stay away from me!" while yelling.

I could suddenly see all the pain in her eyes, and remembered staring into those same eyes before when I was younger, and that's when I remembered, she was walking away all alone in the rain, and I yelled, "Ally." and she froze, for a second and slowly turned. "Now you remember huh?" she said crossing her arms while shaking her head.

I stayed quiet, I was just looking at her remembering how small, fragile, girl she was, and now she's changed, "What happened to all the postcards you were suppose to send me? Why'd you leave me Austin you said you were always gonna protect me then you left just like that, YOU PROMISED TO COME BACK FOR ME TO TAKE ME AWAY FROM HIM I WAITED FOR YOU EVERYDAY LOOKKING OUT MY WINDOW AND YOU NEVER CAME BACK, AUSTIN YOU NEVER CAME BACK!" She screamed while crying and hitting me with her tiny fist.

I tried to calm her but nothing worked she just screamed, cried, and hit me I was still shocked at everything that was happening, "He still hits you?" I said with my voice cracking scared to hear her response. She froze before then unrolling her sleeves, and showing me the bruises that have been covered with makeup but washed away from the rain.

"Theses scars and bruises he left me are nothing, but scars on my porcelain skin, now your outside me you see all the beauty and a weak smile." She told me.  
"Ally...I-I'm sorry I'm sorry, I'm sorry." I said with my voice trembling not knowing what to say anymore but sorry, I wasn't sure what to feel I could see hurt, pain, and sorrow in her eyes, the only things I think she's ever known. "I waited for you everyday counting down every second, every minute in the hour of an day watching the months pass by like nothing, I waited and you didn't comeback for me...you promised." Ally cried softly while holding on top of my shirt tightly.

I was then left speechless still in shock, still trying to process everything through, Ally was crying into my shirt holding fist of it in her tiny hands, we stood there in the cold rain, I held her in my arms softly as she cried while my hand was on the back of her head. When she was in my hands all I felt was complete something I don't remember feeling without Ally by my side...

This won't end Quietly.

**Well what you think, please review it'll mean a lot thanks for whoever read my new story I hope you all liked it and I worked hard on it I got the idea from a beautiful song called, 'Your ex-lover is dead' by Stars! I wish you all a goodnight, morning, evening, afternoon, or whatever time it is over where you are! Bye January xoxo **


	2. Chapter 2

**What Is Love?**

**Austin's P.O.V**

" I'm sorry" I said continuously as she was in my arms crying I didn't know what to do, when girls usually cry I normally don't give two shits, but this situation, and this girl Ally is all different.

After a while we went inside the house where we got repetitive questions from our parents, Ally just went up to her room and didn't come out for a couple hours so I sat there in the guest bedroom thinking, and thinking about her, our memories, and all we went through.

Being back in this house brings the past back to the present, and I remember walking down these familiar hallways, and the think scent of lavender is still in every room.

As I explored the house I kept on having flashbacks of us playing together, laughing, and going on adventures with each other, seeing me being actually happy for once was so weird, but then I started having all the bad flashbacks of her father hitting her, and it felt all too real.

I could hear her screams, and cries for help, and I saw myself not knowing what to do, I felt my chest tighten and my breathing seemed to has stopped by the fear of seeing her being beaten the way she was.

Thats when I stopped looking around and went back to the guest bedroom, I laid in the bed and pulled out a cigarette, our parents were out, anyways so I wouldn't be nagged. As I smoked I started to relax, and tried to forget bout all the disturbing flashbacks I saw. I just closed my eyes as I blew out the smoke from my mouth...

" You know smoking is one of the leading causes of lung cancer, and other types of cancer, and diseases that affects ones respiratory system, and 1 in 3 youth smokers are more likely to die at an early age." said Ally with her arms crossed by the door.

I then jumped, and was startled by her, " You scared me." I said to her as I took the cigarette out of my mouth, " I didn't know you smoked." She said quietly, and I looked at her curiously and said, " Yeah, are you okay, from all the crying, and you know?" While sitting up on my bed.

She then looked down, and nodded without looking at me, " It's really been a long time huh?" I asked and she gave me a forced smile while nodding again. " I was looking back at some of our old photos, I could tell we were really close." I told her trying to get the conversation going.

" We _were_ till you left me." Ally said and I could see her eyes getting misty, and then guilt came over me again, and I absolutely hate the feeling of seeing her cry. " Why? That's my only question...why did you leave me on my birthday?" She asked coming closer to me.

" Remember it was a chilly August day, and I was waiting for you to come over so we could celebrate, remember how I never really had any friends, and so you were the only one I invited, even though me and you made those little invitation cards and passed them out at school? I was waiting with my mom, looking out the window for you, and when you finally came I rushed out." She said while smiling as her tears fell from her cheeks and onto the floor.

" I told you to come on and get inside so we could sing Happy Birthday and cut the small little cake my mom baked, and then you broke the news to me that you were leaving, but would come back for me soon, and how you would write me postcards but you never did?" She continued still with her arms crossed.

" Then you left just like that. I counted each step you took as you walked away, that day It was only me, and my mom and when I was about to blow out the candles, I made my wish for you to come back soon to take me away from my dad who later that day came back home, and...beat me even thought it was my birthday." Ally finished wiping away her tears.

" Ally- I really don't know what to say." I said looking down while shrugging my shoulders, " Maybe, an explanation would be nice" She told me and I bit my lip down nervously while looking at my shoes, " Are you going to tell me?" She asked

" I left to protect you." I said " What do You mean?" She then asked with curiosity, " My mom saw the way you, and your mom were being abused, and asked me if I wanted to leave, she thought being exposed to that kind of violence at my young age wasn't good. My mom said if we left we could get help for you, since here is a small town and you can't really do anything." I told her

" I wanted to get you out of the situation you and your mom were in and thought that by leaving we could get help, and save you guys, but I don't know what went wrong my mom gave up easily, there was nothing we could really do honestly. Years passed by and I guess I just started to forget everything." I then finished and looked up to her.

She just stood there frozen, I could see she was trying to process everything through and then she finally spoke up, " My mom didn't want help, she thought things would get better, but they never did she must've lied to your mom so my dad wouldn't hurt us when he figured out we were trying to leave him."

Ally then walked over to me slowly, then sat down by my side, and looked at me closely for a while, my breathing felt to have stopped as she place her tiny, delicate hands on my cheek, and she traced over my face with her fingers.

The room was filled with silence, all you could hear was the sound of us breathing in and out slowly. It's been a while since the time between us has stopped. Ally then traced her fingers over my lips, and that's when I grabbed her tiny hand into mine and took it off my face. We then sat there in an awkward silence.

" I wouldn't get too close to me if I were you, I'm not the same little boy you knew 5 years ago, everything's different now. Don't get comfortable with me, because I'm a whole different person, that you will probably never understand." I then told her sternly.

" Seems to me like you don't even know yourself, so for me to hopefully one day understand you is a misunderstanding itself ." She said while looking up at me.

" Your right, I don't know myself there's lots of things I don't know like what love is, or what happiness is. The real name of love is hatred, and hope is just the parent of disappointment and despair." I told her.

" I know some people smile with an effort, as if they were happy, while hiding the lie in the word love as if it'll be forever." Ally then said to me sadly, relating to me surprisingly.

Then there was another long sustained silence, " I see you saw the picture of us in 3d grade at the Winter Program." She then said while picking up a couple of the pictures I was looking at. " Huh? Oh yeah sorta wierd I looked a mess back then." I told her.

" That's what I say to myself every year." Ally said while giggling a bit, and I smiled by her side. " I remember this picture it was the same day you got rejected from the girl down the block, who could blame her? You told her the worst pickup line ever." Ally told me, and then I began remembering that day distinctly.

" Oh yeah I remember that day, and at that time I thought that would get her for sure!" I said. " It was funny though." She told me, and I shook my head while chuckling. " Now, I get a lot of girls without even trying." I said to her as she looked through more pictures.

" Oh really...how many?" She asked raising a brow, " More than I can remember." I said to her. " They all fall for me with one glance." I continued, " Not me." She then said while looking at me with confidence. " Really?" I asked suspiciously.

" I don't make your blood freeze when I look at you?" I asked as I approached her closer, " Are you sure I don't make your heart beat a mile a minute when we touch?" I continued as I came closer and closer to her. I could see she was beginning to get nervous as I brought my face closer to her, our lips inches apart.

" Austin...you have an eye buger." Ally said to me totally killing everything, I then backed away slowly from her and wiped my eye, " I knew that." I said, " It's the other one." She told me and I sighed and wiped my other eye in embarrassment. " I'm hard to get at, I built my walls way up high so no one can get in." Ally said

I then made it my mission to break down all of her walls, so I could be the only one she ever lets in.

" Hey, do the two lovers still live in the house right across the street?" I asked curiously, " The Mcandlers?" She asked while looking up at me, and I nodded. " No, they moved out years ago, the house is empty no one lives there anymore." Ally said disappointingly. " Oh that's all bad, I remember me, and you would watch them out of your bedroom window how they would look at each other, and hold hands." I said while looking down.

" Yeah that was real love, they were married for a really long time, they never fought they were peaceful, remember Ally when we swore to each other that one day if we never found love like that we would never get married to anyone,because if not we wouldn't be truly happy?" I asked her

She smiled and nodded, " I use to always promise you with my pinky finger." She said. " I always wanted someone to look at me they way he did to her, but I don't think anyone will." Ally finished.

" You don't know that..." I said while smiling at her...

" All I know is that I don't want a love complicated, and calculated like the adults

" ALLY- YOU PIECE OF CRAP WHERE ARE YOU?" yelled an unsettling voice of a man coming from downstairs, I knew who it was but I tried to trick myself by saying it wasn't, but that's not how it works in life.

I could see Ally's face struck with fear, she looked at me and then stood up, and headed downstairs where I followed her with fear. " Ally- who...who is this person?" He asked a mid 30, man with salt and pepper hair who Ally called Dad.

" This is Austin." She said quietly while fiddling with her hands nervously, " Austin I remember you, I was expecting your arrival, but now that your here leave, this room I have to have a chat with my daughter...Now!" He yelled once he saw I wasn't moving, and then I quickly left and waited by the stairs.

"You...I heard some news around town that your telling people I hit you, and your mother, what did I tell you, what did I tell you Ally if you ever told anyone what I do? Tell me c'mon?" I heard him say.

" I didn't tell anyone must be just rumors people make up when they see the bruises on us." Ally said quite quietly with her voice shaking with every word.

I then heard the sound of his heavy footsteps coming towards her, and after that a loud slap. I could hear her gasp in surprise, and when I looked at her, her eyes weren't ready to cry.

" Now tell me what did I say would happen if you told anyone anything?" He asked once more.

" You- You would kill us...but I'd like to see you try you bastard! I'm basically already dead so go on beat me, BEAT ME, KILL ME, go ahead try!" Ally yelled at the top of her lungs.

All I heard then was the sound of chairs falling, glass breaking, and smacks going about, but one thing I didn't hear we're screams, or cries for help. When I looked into the hallway I saw Ally lying on the floor being struck so many time and with each hit I cringed feeling the pain also.

I saw her, she didn't cry or yell for help she just laid there and took it, I then figured she was use to the pain to the point where she couldn't even feel It anymore. Her dad then kicked her one last time as he got up, and walked away out the door as if nothing had happened.

After, he left I quickly ran by Ally's side, and asked her if she was okay, which was a stupid question considering how bad she was beaten she was not okay. I then helped her up, and took her back to her room. " Uh Aus- Austin ?" She mumbled with her eyes closed and blood running down her face.

" Yeah I'm here. It's okay he's gone." I told her reassuringly, " N-No nothing is...ever okay." She said stuttering with her hands shaking, and mines were to. " Things will be." I said to her while wiping away the blood from her face with damp tissues, and bandaging her cuts. " When?" Ally asked, and that was a question I really didn't know the answer to.

So I replayed with when I wanted things to be okay which was, " Soon.", she didn't replay I guess she figured I wasn't sure. " I'm sorry I should've done something, I in a way caused you this pain." I said unsteadily.

" That's the thing about pain in demands to be felt."(**1) **Ally said to me, I could see she was tired, and with me feeling this was in a way my fault I wanted to distract her from what happened, so I took out a whole bunch of old photographs of us as kids, and made her look at them with me.

" Hey look, remember that day we were only like what 7 and we went to the beach, and I was changing while my mom had the towel up, and your little cousin was fussy, and accidentally made my mom drop the towel when I was trying to pUt on my underwear, and everyone saw?" I said to her while lying on the bed by her side.

She giggled but I could see was still weak from earlier, the rest of that evening was us together looking at old pictures, and memories there With the sky beginning to cry again.

" We were under the same sky, but at different places." Ally said to me softly when we were talking about after I left. " I always wondered where you were and what you were doing that very moment. I struggled so desperately to get back all our memories, like the wind they slipped through looking as though they would reach me, but did not." Ally said

" My chest was tightened by loneliness and despair, but I always remembered those days when we were happy...Austin?" She then asked. " Yeah?" I said

" Can we please return back once more to those times, I promise everything will be alright this time. I'll always be smiling by your side...close by your side." Ally said to me before drifting off to sleep.

We stayed there on the bed with a whole bunch of photographs around us, and memories lingering a bout the room, so quietly without any sound.

I honestly don't know weather or not I can be the person she wants me to be, I'm different nothing ever last forever in the end everyone changes, there's never any sincerity.

Ally...Ally...Ally I watched her and listened to her slow steady breathing and I stayed there with her wanting her to rest.

She doesn't know that her smiling face has always remained in my memories, and to see all she can give me are forced smile hurts in a way, so now all I continue to ask for is for her to smile for me.

**Hey! Well so so so so sorry for not updating in the longest! I have really been busy and apologize to all you readers of this and my other fanfics! Love you all, and don't ever worry becuase I will always update sometime soon! So tell me what you thought and leave your comments and Ideas in the reviews! thank you!**


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